I started a post about my birthday several times, starting this past May. Could never finish it. And, suddenly, summer 2021 was upon us and living up to the new decade’s trend and hype. It has had, so far, all the elements of surprise and uncertainty that has been with us since 2020.
And the summer is still young.
Let’s start with the weather. It alternates between hot and cold, wet and dry (mostly wet), cloudy and sunny, oftentimes all in the same day. Of course, the mood of our souls fluctuates with it, filled with bouts of anxiety alternating with excitement reflecting the fear at events unfolding and tomorrow’s uncertainties. And the unknown has never felt so uncertain to so many of us. And we struggle to keep hoping.
It feels weird and unsettling.
There is the certitude that we will no longer go back to the familiar, that we are entering a new era and the world will never be the same. Not much scares us more than the uncertainty of this new journey and where it will take us. We no longer feel confident, we do not recognize the lay of the land, and we feel like we are on quicksand.
It feels weird and unsettling.
In the past month, a cousin has passed, two close friends have transitioned, a close relative is hospitalized with COVID-19, people are being murdered and you wonder when will we learn and when will it end? A friend disappoints, someone you love and has been in your life for as long as you’ve lived gets off the train of your life, and you go on the journey with one less familiar presence and you ask yourself why does it come to this and when will it end?
It feels weird and unsettling.
And one day, one day, after many rainy and dark days, you suddenly hear the chirping of the birds, feel the warmth of the sun, and you realize that you do not need to know how it all ends. A friend calls or texts reminding you that you are valued and the world would not be the same without you in it and you realize that do not need to know how it ends. Six women sit around a table to celebrate one’s birthday, you feel the happiness in the room, and you know that you do not need to know how it ends. You feel warmth and gratitude swell in your heart and constrict your throat and you decide that you do not need to know how it will end. You start to hope again.
You allow yourself to revel in this moment and realize that it is all the certainty you will ever have: the feeling of being alive in this moment. And you lose yourself in this moment. You start breathing consciously, once, twice, thrice……
Then, peace comes, love flows, and you find yourself hoping again.
And you start over, another day, a new day. With purpose and joy.
Regine is a Transportation Executive with a long record of leadership and excellence. Regine uses her professional success to enrich her life and others’ through creative and philanthropic initiatives in the US and Haiti. She seeks to sustain her Joy and live with Purpose.
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